Dave Burnette's Commentary

2 Samuel Chapter 13

Written By: God through Inspiration
Penned By: Nathan, Zabud, & Gad 
Date Penned: (930 BC)
Overview: A Record of David's Reign (c 1-24)
Theme: David's Struggles (c 11-24)
Message: Amnon Rapes Tamar (v 1-39)

2 Samuel 13 Commentary

(13:1) Consequences of David's Sin Continue - David now faced sins in his own family that were a consequence of those he had committed (see 12:10-12). The sin in his life was magnified in the lives of his children. If you are a parent, you can't always control what your children do, but you can love and obey God and show them how to live their lives in obedience to God's will.

(13:3:5) Ammon Follows Bad Advice -  Amnon was encouraged by his cousin Jonadab to commit sexual sin. We may be more vulnerable to the advice of our relatives and friends because we are close to them. However, make sure to evaluate every piece of advice by God's standards, even when it comes from those you are closest to.

(13:14-15) Amnon Rapes His Sister - Love and lust are very different. After Amnon raped his half sister, his "love" turned to hate. Although he had claimed to be in love, he was actually overcome by lust. Love is patient; lust requires immediate satisfaction. Love is kind; lust is harsh. Love does not demand its own way; lust does. You can read about the characteristics of real love in 1 Corinthians 13. Lust may feel like love at first, but when physically expressed, it results in self-disgust and hatred of the other person. If you just can't wait, what you feel is not true love

(13:16) Amnon Ruins Tamar's Future - Rape was strictly forbidden by God (Deuteronomy 22:28-29). Why would Tamar say that sending her away was even worse? By throwing her out, Amnon made it look as if Tamar had made a shameful proposition to him, and there were no witnesses on her behalf because he had dismissed the servants. His crime destroyed her chances of marriage--since she was no longer a virgin, in that culture she could not be given in marriage.

(13:20) Absalom Plots Revenge - Absalom tried to comfort Tamar and persuade her not to turn the incident into a public scandal. Secretly, he planned to take revenge against Amnon himself. This he would do two years later (13:23-33). Absalom told Tamar the crime was only a family matter. But God's standards for moral conduct are not suspended when we deal with family matters.

(13:21-24) David Fails to Punish Amnon - David was angry with Amnon for raping Tamar, but David did not punish him. David probably hesitated because (1) he didn't want to cross Amnon, who was his firstborn son (1 Chronicles 3:) and therefore next in line to be king, and (2) David was guilty of a similar sin himself in his adultery with Bath-sheba. While David was unsurpassed as a king and military leader, he lacked skill, sensitivity, and integrity as a husband and father.

(13:22) Absalom's Hatred is Kindled - Hatred often leads to disaster. Absalom had reason to be angry with Amnon, but instead of confronting Amnon with his sin, Absalom allowed his anger to fester into hatred. This produced revenge instead of resolution. When you become angry at a wrong done to you or someone else, avoid the mistake of getting even. Instead, try to confront the person and address the issue.

(13:37-39) Absalom Flees to Geshur - Absalom fled to Geshur because King Talmi was his grandfather (1 Chronicles 3:2) and he would be welcomed.

Dave Burnette's Life Application

Sin Lingers Longer than We Want to Stay

Each day we walk through the Bible chapter by chapter, making application of our text to help us grow in the Lord. Today we continue in the book of 2nd Samuel with Chapter 13. In our text, we see the sin of David continuing in his house as his son Amnon rapes his sister Tamar. Hearing this, their brother Absalom murders Amnon. In applying, we see how sin lingers longer than we want it to stay. The sin of David has now stayed longer in his household than he would have ever imagined. Today many see sin and its consequences as a trade-off, but the truth is that our sin affects others. Directly or indirectly, our sin will end up hurting those we love. Do you see the lingering effects of sin? How about you? Let us learn from our text today, remembering David and how sin lingers longer than we want it to stay.


2 Samuel 13

2 Samuel 13

 1And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.

 2And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do anything to her.

 3But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man.

 4And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.

 5And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand.

 6So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand.

 7Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, Go now to thy brother Amnon's house, and dress him meat.

 8So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in his sight, and did bake the cakes.

 9And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him.

 10And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.

 11And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister.

 12And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly.

 13And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee.

 14Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her.

 15Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.

 16And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her.

 17Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her.

 18And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her.

 19And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying.

 20And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house.

 21But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth.

 22And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.

 23And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baalhazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king's sons.

 24And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant.

 25And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him.

 26Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee?

 27But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him.

 28Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.

 29And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.

 30And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king's sons, and there is not one of them left.

 31Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent.

 32And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king's sons; for Amnon only is dead: for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar.

 33Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king's sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead.

 34But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him.

 35And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king's sons come: as thy servant said, so it is.

 36And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king's sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore.

 37But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day.

 38So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years.

 39And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.